Ghetto FOBulous

Memory Lane

It's those feelings. You're looking at her. She glances at you and then looks away. It's obvious to any third party that both you and her are thinking the same thing but you're too much of a chicken shit to do anything and she doesn't know what's suppose to happen next. So finally after you play eye tag for 15 minutes and wipe off the sweat from your hands, you say, "Ah, fuck it!" and try and move in for the kill. Of course back then, the kill didn't mean shit compared to what kids are doing these days but hey, a kiss was tough for me then alright so get off my back! Anyway... You're close. She's inches away. All you got to do is nod your head forward... But then you realize, "Wait a minute! This isn't my girl..."

Or...

Why do I do all this crap for her?!?! She's not that hot. And she's not that nice. But here I'm standing at the stupid counter ready to dish out 5 bills on this girl. And for what? Everyone of those jerks says I should kick her to the curb. In my heart I know she's no good for me and that they're right but... But here I am standing thinking if I buy this for her, it'll make her happy and maybe things will get better. Oh man, I'm such a tool. Screw this! I'm outta here! I'll get her a big fat F U for Christmas and see how she likes... "Excuse me sir, how will you be paying for this Hermes bracelet?" The sales lady asks. "Um... charge." :( Shit, fuck, shit, fuck, a;dlkjfao;ht gqbjgpadhsfgoaihdg!!!!

Yup. You guessed it. This past weekend I took a trip down memory lane in different ways. One was the obvious year book. That brings back memories for everyone. And the second was having conversations with friends reminding me of past poor decisions. Yeah, like I needed that! Thanks by the way, you bastards!!!

But anyway, these instances got me thinking about how I used to be. Ten years ago... Three years ago... A couple of months ago... I remember back in high school I was such a lame, love sick, loser. I wanted more than anything just to find the perfect mate for myself. Yeah, in high school. Like I'm likely to find a soul mate in high school. I had a better chance of finding out I'm gay then that, but that's another story.

So... moving along, again this weekend I'm reminded of how I used to be. Which is a bitch! A big, fat, whipped bitch! Excuse me sir would you like me to pick up the soap so you can ram me up the butt BITCH! You get what I'm saying? I don't know what came over me, but I was doing whatever it is this girl wanted. I just couldn't help myself.

And here I am now. Reflecting on the man I used to be. Or still am. I haven't figured that out yet. I hope I've gotten better as a person because of the past failed relationships I've been in but who knows. Who can decide that? I certainly can't. I guess time will tell. But as God as my witness, if any other girl tries to drag me around by my twig and berries I swear I'll beat the living... no I won't. I'll probably marry her... :( Ah shit!!!!

posted by Ghetto FOBulous @ 10:44 AM