Ghetto FOBulous

Write Bitches!

The lack of work lately has forced me to search upon the web to find something interesting. And since I'm limited to non-pr0n sites, I've been looking at other blogs to see what other people write. And man, are most of them pretty boring! I don't know if it's the lack of talent to write or just the fact that their lives are not interesting, but most of the blogs I've come across are just people ranting about their daily lives. "My boss was a jerk today!" "In class, they made us read this whole book!" "Last night, he put it in my butt..." Oh wait, I think that last one was from a porn site.

But come on! I know some people out there have interesting things going on in their lives. Where's the guy's blog who trains monkeys to throw their feces at you? "Bobo was acting unusually happy today. Normally, he'll spend all day, angrily flinging any piece of crap that flops out of his ass at the first onlooker who stops. But today he's just been masturbating all over his cage..." Or how come you don't see blogs from people like the bouncer at strip clubs? "Today Javi came in at his usual time... 11 a.m. for the chicken wing/lap dance special. But from the smell of things, he'd already had a few 40's of OE. I checked to see if there was a fire hydrant on the hood of his car but that turned out clean so I walked him straight into the champagne room..."

Now these kinds of blogs would make my cube life pass by much faster. But alas, I cannot find them. Or they do not exist. In either case, I'm still sitting here pretending to write an imaginary blank email that pretty much has been embedded onto my screen. You'd think by now they would have spotted me making my rounds flirting with all the cougars, or just sitting here writing one email all day long. But I guess that's something I shouldn't question.

So please... if you're my friend. Write something interesting. Entertain me. Or even if you're not my friend, F-U! I hate you! I hope you get raped by rabid dogs... Twice! Please write something to retaliate. Help me escape the monotony of an office life.

Thank you, come again...

posted by Ghetto FOBulous @ 10:50 AM